Frank

One of my other sisters called me last night and told me some potentially devastating news. Devastating you say? Yes, very much so. The news concerns our other sisters boyfriend. He's very sick, to the point where they do not expect him to live much longer. She calls and ask that I pray for him. How? What do I want? What does he want? Can I do anything? Can I make a difference? If so, what kind of a difference can I make?

These are the questions that I asked myself. To compound matters, our other sister has had some hard times and has checked herself into a facility to get some help. She doesn't know that her boyfriend is gravely ill. Does someone tell her and risk her coming out of the facility and spiraling down that path again? It's way too complicated for one person to fathom. I can't solve this with anything I say to anyone, I can't make people change, nor can I force my beliefs on anyone. I wish that I could though. What would I tell them?

I would tell them that there is a better way. Jesus offers that better way. It's not a joke or the opiate of the masses. We hear that and people call Christians freaks because they don't understand the realness of being close to Jesus. I can't explain it. The only thing I can ever suggest is to try it. Why all this? I'm scared, I don't know if Frank has ever accepted Jesus into his life. What if he hasn't? What if, what if, what if? Is it too late? From what I understand, Frank is delusional and out of his right mind right now. What do I pray for? What can I do all these miles away?

I'm torn, they gave him a pretty raw dianosis. When someone says that three quarters of your heart is not functioning and the persons body begins to fill up with fluid there doesn't seem to be much hope. I want him to be completely healed. I want Frank to live. But, is that what concerns me the most? No! What concerns me the most is his spiritual health. Call me freak then, I don't care anymore. What if this man dies and there is something else that I could have done to 'preach' to him and I didn't. I recall him sitting in my house about a year and a half ago and I preached at him a little and told him that it is through the power of God that changes lives. I didn't just put it all out there on the line though and ask him if he had ever accepted Christ. Do you think I did the wrong thing by not just asking him? It's these tragedies that always put me back to this place of wondering if I've done enough.

I am not ashamed of Christ but I am so not eloquent when it comes to face to face talks with people about the saving, healing, loving, forgiving, and on and on and on power of the Lord. I can write it like a big dog though. It's real, I know this and nothing can ever change my opinion regarding that. I've experienced it and also I watch and wonder after all of my many, many screw ups why the Lord continues to put up with me. I know that there is hope for anyone.

This is not about me though, this is about Frank. This is about what to pray and what to say. I told my sister when she called to pray for peace. Peace for Frank's mind and his family and friends. Peace for his very soul to let the spirit do what needs to be done. I'd hate to be in that place and not know for sure that the Lord will never leave me or forsake me. I'd hate to not have the comforting joy that no matter what, my family would understand and know for sure that even if I passed I would be going to a better place.

So, I pray for Frank today. I pray for his peace and healing in his body but most of all I pray that if he's never been given a chance or even if he has that he gets the clear message of the gospel. Frank's had some issues but what has he done that is so terrible in comparison to the rest of us? Though we do not want to hear it, sin is sin. The point is that no one is perfect or better than anyone else. We are all the same which puts us all in the same boat and it gives us all the same opportunities. An equal opportunity God!

Pray for Frank and his family, pray for my sister's wellbeing.

God Bless. If you haven't experienced the love of Christ I suggest you ask and seek Jesus. He changes lives.

Just when you think things are going good

From time to time, just when you think things are going good there is a little roadblock. It's days like this that we hate at the time. Always remember it is those roadblocks though that stand out in our mind. They create memories of their own. Memories of...I was tootling along and then IT happened!


I know, blah, blah, blah, what's the point. Well, I had a roadblock this week. Now though, it's Friday and life is sweet again, like chocolate covered strawberries. I can face the weekend feeling like something actually happened in my life and it sure wasn't the same ole' boring week that is for sure. Roadblock vs. opportunity not to have the same ole boring week? You decide.

My little sister got married

They did it! They tied the knot or any other thing you want to call it. What do I call it? I call it a fabulous event. I am so happy that my little sister finally got married. She didn't just marry any ole' guy either. She actually married a really nice guy with an equally loving family. It's hard when you release someone you love into the care of someone else. There is a certain amount of uneasiness that comes. Fortunately, she made an outstanding choice and in my opinion, so did he.

I could go on and on with numerous accolades about my little sister. She is a wonderful person who has a strong family base. What I mean by that is that she cares about everyone and from watching her over the years one thing that I've learned is that she will make the hard choices and the sacrifices for her family. My only hope is that she will continue to do the same with her new husband. Just support whatever he's doing and things will always work out. It is her genuine kindness and honesty as a person that draws family and friends to her.

The only thing I really want to say is that it was a beautiful wedding and I am thankful that I was invited to their nuptials. It was good stuff. Of course I have to say, that when they move out of state that I do pray that they find a local church to attend. That's just me! I want them to not only be grounded in each other but also grounded to a local church that feeds them spiritually also. It's important for people to be connected--to meet new people. DO NOT GET CAUGHT UP IN RELIGION! Religion is rigorous and cumbersome and personally, I don't think things were meant to be that way. But! get connected somewhere and enjoy life.

I love you baby girl. With all my heart I love you and I as I come to know your husband I am sure I will love him too. You made an excellent choice. Always speak your mind but also know when to be silent, things just have a way of working themselves out sometimes. I entrust you, make that we, me and your brother, entrust you with confidence into the hands of someone else. I never thought that day would come but it has. Remember always, we love you very, very much and so do the boys. Gosh, I forgot to mention something about the boys. Dude! You have totally watched them grow up. Don't forget about them in your future travels. They love you very much and have said excellent things about you. You inspired them. I will quote from what the baby said, "She didn't date a whole bunch of people, she waited for the right one to come along and she got married to him." Good stuff my friend.

Let's see, I think that's it. I preached a little because I care about you, if not, I wouldn't put myself out on the line. Look at me, I am so not perfect. I still struggle in so many ways but we are all imperfect people who live in an imperfect world. The best we can do is the best we can do.

Always do the best you can for yourself, I could not ask for more. You both are wonderful people and you know we are always here for you, whatever you need. Okay this is my very last thing. Try to make-up with your friend before you leave. I was in a similar situation when I married your brother. Eventually, I made-up with my friend but it took 10 years. Learn from one of my many mistakes. True friendship is forever no matter what.

Look who's back

Today marks the beginning of something good I hope. I helped someone set up a new BLOG this weekend and realized what a fool I've been for not maintaining my own site. Silly me. I've had a ton to say but have chosen to keep it all in.

No more! There is one particular person who will stay unnamed that I have a very serious issue with. This person is a total and complete racist jerk. It challenges my Americanized brain to see how people who are racist operate. An incident or two concerning my kids took place and I had to do the 'smoke this sucker out' thing. He rang true to his true colors. For those of you who are non-ethnic, unfortunately I can't give away trade secrets so you'll have to ask someone else how to expose the racist.

I was shocked when the exposure took place but generally, we already have a clue but I think we use it as the final evidence to convict. It would be much easier, I think if a racist person just came out and said they were racist. If people would just have enough nerve to come out and admit it it would be so less time consuming.

Anyway, it is unfortunate that these types of people are elevated in Idaho to positions of authority without being kept in-check. This frightens me. It is amazing how this happens right under our very noses. Look at all of the fallout over comments made by our new State Leader. He created a storm of trouble this last week. He got blasted in the newspaper in New Orleans and they accused him of being racist based on comments he made to a European newspaper.

Initially my reaction was to defend Jim Risch but then when I started thinking about it I had to come to the realization that yeah, there are a ton of racist, narrowminded bigots in my state. Some hidden, some right out there on front street. What do we do? At least the ones that are right out on front street are visible and it does not require the 'smoke them out' dance to expose them. Instead at least I know what I am working with. It is the hidden racists that I am most threatened by. The ones that have no interest in you as a person except to dominate you secretly. It sounds outlandish and 'overly sensitive' on my part but it's not. It is the full on truth.

My latest dealings with this last person was odd. This butthead won in some ways in the end. But, he does not understand that it is not up to me to have the last laugh. As hard as it is to do, I must turn his backwards butt over to the Lord. I must let Him, who can do so much more than I, take care of this battle. I started thinking about slavery. Why as a culture did we endure for hundreds of years? I think it was our faith in the Lord. He gave us as a people the strength to endure the hardships we faced. In the end many lives were lost. Why? Those lives were lost so I could have the freedom today to continue to confront the racism that exists in my world. I can freely express and expose the oppression faced by minorities in Idaho.

And for that, I am thankful for a people who persevered until the end and gave up their lives for me to freely expose those who still try to oppress us in large and small ways.

Pray for your enemies and those who despitefully use you.


Dawn